#but then I go ‘let’s try being normal this time. make it easier on the machine’

[jambalaya-enthusiast]

I have no idea what this is, I had a dream and I just need to write this shit down. im going thru it rn. trust.

mentions of throwing up, kind of ooc jimmy, just feels, cursing.

The bass from the party music still thumped across the room, while you decided to be quick on your feet and drag your legs towards the balcony door, trying to get some fresh air from the cramped atmosphere you were trapped in for who knows how long.

once the balcony door opened, a wave of cold air stung your face, whooshing past you, and scattering a few hair strands here and there, you stepped outside, and walked towards the railing. you stood there, just breathing and taking in all the glory of the dimly lit night sky, and looked at the skyline glowing vibrantly with distant noises of traffic and the citylife.

"crawled out of the wild night?", A voice from behind you made you whip your head back and come face to face with your boyfriend, jimmy.

"you seriously call that a party? Half of them have puked up whatever cheap alcohol they'd drank. It's so gross". you retorted back at him. "Can we leave already? please? Let's stay over at my place instead, yeah?". you suggested.

Instead of answering or even giving you a nod as an acknowledgement, jimmy decided to instead stare at you, so intently that it made you gulp a lump which'd formed in your throat, he stared at you with his lips curled into a subtle smile, so subtle it wouldn't even have caught your eye if you weren't paying attention. And then, as suddenly as he'd started staring, he said,

"Why are you actually with me?". He said in a tone so deadpan that you would've thought that he was out of it. "What? Are you okay?".

"No, y/n I'm asking you, I'm being serious, why do you even like me?". Jimmy said. "Jim are you okay? Where is this coming from? Now, of all times?".

Arguments with your boyfriend weren't an uncommon occurrence, it was as normal as deciding to drink a cup of coffee. This, however, was new. Your arguments never revolved around him being conscious about his self worth.

"A day never goes by without us arguing, without any of your 'friends' telling you to leave me. without me calling you a whore at least twice a day. So why are you with me even after all of it? It would've been easier for me to understand if you were a hooker, just looking for a place to crash at without trying to make actual connections. But you don't have any reason, so why are you with me?".

You were left dumbfounded, was this actually happening? Him, of all people, asking you why you loved him? Was this his idea of a joke?

"Jim did they fucking poison you at the party? Do you even realise what you're asking me?". You decided to answer.

"I know damn well what I'm talking about, y/n. Now answer the fucking question, why do you love me? Do you have some kinda messiah complex? trying to 'fix' me? or something like that? a new type of fetish?".

Your jaw was practically left hanging at your boyfriend's sudden display of aggressive attitude towards defending the idea that you loved him for an ulterior motive.

"Why don't you hate me?". He snapped once again.

"Because you don't give me any reason to". You finally said back.

"Oh don't give me that crap, I give ya plenty of reason to dump my ass and run away from me, any other person would've called the fuckin' cops on me". He continued on.

"Because I love you, Jim". You stopped him mid sentenced.

"I love you not in the sense that I want to get in your pants or steal your wallet, or save you from your misery, or whatever else nonsense you have going on in your mind". Jimmy was still looking at you with narrowed, skeptical eyes.

"I love you, as one might love another person, simply because they wanna love them. I love you, because I want to love you". You didn't realise that your chest was starting to feel heavy, and your vision was getting blurry, but you continued on.

"I love you because... because I want to. Not because I have to, not because there's some fuckin'... i don't know, social obligation that one must require to love another? I don't have it, i don't need it. You make me want to love you without any cause, I love you in the sense that... I love you because I can, I love you in the way that I need to... let you know that I can't do without you goddamn it. Why? Do you not want me to love you?".

At this point tears were flowing down your cheeks like a goddamn waterfall, you weren't yelling, you weren't pleading. you were simply letting your boyfriend know that you loved him.

Jimmy's eyes were wide, it's almost as if he'd seen some ghost, trying to prove to him its existence. Without saying a word hugged you so tight as if it was the last thing he could do before dying.

"I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm so fucking sorry". He repeated those words like a mantra, neither of you know what came over for this conversation to take place in the first place, but now that it has. You're unsure if you wanted for this to have never happened.

[purble-turble]

I know TT Red takes place Season 1, but how do you think he handles S2 to S5?

There's so many ways this could potentially go, where on so many ocassions TT Red goes to the future in the middle of an adventure and gets traumatized way more than how much LBD did to MK.

Season 4 would be such a mess, especially if all of TT Red's experiences got documented in the scroll of memory once he got sucked in, and then MK and Mei had to go through so many of these futures trying to find TT Red.

AND SEASON 5. Oh dear I think I know how this would make sense now:

This is post season five and TT Red's way of going "I don't want you killing yourself all over again, this is for your protection. Just like for Wukong, I want you to be out of trouble. Please trust me I love you dearly (BUT NOT TOO MUCH) and I wanna make sure you're alive and well."

TT Red becomes an absolute wreck by the end of lmk so far and I think it would absolutely show during this sort of timeline.

Oh my god.. ok, so that Season 5 aftermath you proposed is great, but I HAVE to focus on what you said about the memory scroll for season 4 because it’s fucking amazing!

Red Son gets pulled into the memory scroll, but instead of just being his past in its relation to Journey to the West, EVERYTHING he has done, including all the futures he has had to visit, all have had an influence on how the scroll appears for him.. He’s got some wild, temporal/interdimensional nonsense going on with him that makes the scroll act in unusual ways, so honestly why are they even surprised? 😂

MK and the gang all have to find their way through a bunch of different universes in which there are different versions of themselves but also almost every one of them has a Red Son, too.. So not only do they have to watch out and not lose track of each other lest they not know which of them is which (they definitely do at points, maybe even all getting split up and ending up in a future of their own) but they also need to figure out which of these Red Sons is actually THEIR Red Son so they can jar his memory and get him back to his normal self… this is easier said than done.

Also, it gives them all a little taste of just how fucked up TT Red’s solo time adventures are sometimes. They see versions of the world where the city is destroyed, where demons have destroyed Pigsy’s Noodles, where one or several of them have died, that one where Red Son sacrificed himself and MK is left sad and hollow.. not all of them are so bad, though. Maybe they get lucky and stumble upon one where it’s way far in the future and Red and MK are happily married with a family, and MK hopes beyond hope pLEASE let this Red Son be HIS Red Son… it’s not, but boy that would have been nice if that was his, like, “true self” or whatever this scroll is doing to them.

Eventually they make it to the start of it all: Demon King Red’s timeline. MK is desperate at this point to find his Red Son, but when he makes his way into this lavish throne room and sees a king version of Red sitting on a throne, he’s like “oh FUCK no. That is definitely NOT my Red Son.” All his friends are hemming and hawing like, well, maybe it could be?? Isn’t that how Red Son sees himself? Isn’t becoming that guy what he’s afraid of??? It’s kinda shitty, but maybe the scroll WOULD turn Red Son into Demon King Red.

MK isn’t convinced. He insists that it’s NOT POSSIBLE. In fact, he uses his Smartie Kid brain and deduces that, for all the rest of them, they were lost in a role of a person that they used to be, whether it was a reincarnation or an ancestor or whatever their deal was… but Red Son has never been (and NEVER WILL BE, MK insists) Demon King Red. So they’ve been going about this all wrong. They shouldn’t be trying to find the Red Son for each of these timelines and seeing if their Red has been turned into them.. they should be trying to find wherever their own Red Son would be in within that timeline!

In the case of Demon King Red, MK remembers what he was told about his time in the palace.. he dodges a hug from the mad king, leaving his friends to hold him off, and scoots right past him to make a break for the dungeon. He finds his Red Son locked up down there- short hair, tattered jacket, square glasses and all.. but something new as well: a red circlet on his head.

When he spots MK he starts to panic, he insists that MK go and leave him there. He shouldn’t have come to rescue him- he’s not worth it! If the mad king finds MK there, it will be all over, and freeing Red Son isn’t worth the risk! MK pries open the cell and reaches out for Red, insisting that isn’t true. He’ll always be there for him, even when he’s at his lowest because he loves him! Red Son still doesn’t go for his hand, falling back and curling in on himself in despair. He insists again that that makes no sense… MK should hate him. He would be fully justified to leave Red behind to rot in this cell forever.. it’s no less than he deserves.

MK has to grab him, cupping his face forcefully in his hands and making Red Son look up at him again to stop him from spiraling. No, he shouts, that’s wrong! Red Son doesn’t deserve this! Not one bit of it! He has worked so SO hard to change himself into a better person, and the fact that he is has been through so much and seen so many terrible possible futures but is still trying so hard means he is already a thousand times better than Demon King Red. He is NOT Demon King Red, and thanks to his own tireless efforts, he never will be! All he has to do is not give up that hope to make this better.

Finally, this gets through to Red Son. The fillet around his head disappears, and he blinks a few times in confusion, coming out of the stupor the scroll had put him in… of course the two of them are still in the dungeon, which is extra confusing for Red Son, but MK just takes his hand and leads him back to his friends. They’re still fighting to hold off the scroll version of Demon King Red, and I think upon seeing TT Red Son out of his cell and back to normal, he probably morphs into a horrific, ink monster version of the king.. and let’s say this is the scene where Mei’s sword gets broken and they all get separated again, so things go back to the canon plot line :U

Gosh that was fun.. I do love fitting my AUs into the canon plot~

[galaxyedging]

Personal post TW:anxiety, depression, disordered eating.

I'm openly about my struggles with anxiety and depression. They stem from my ND conditions and my medical ones.

The one thing I'm not so open about is my disorder eating. I am a binge eater. I have a compulsion to eat sugar and junk food even when I'm not hungry. I plan my day around making sure I have access to junk food. When things are really bad, I will get stressed out if I don't have at least two different types of food to binge even if I have a large amount of one.

If I try to cut down on food, it is all I think about. It changes my moods. I become stressed and agitated. I can't rest until I eat again. I feel empty and starved even after food if it isn't junk or sugary.

I don't normally speak about it because I'm ashamed. I'm ashamed of my lack of self-control. I tried to reach out for help and was dismissed by my GP.

That was my rock bottom. That's when I decided to stop letting the battle overwhelm me. I stopped being ashamed and started being kind to myself when no one else would. I unpicked all my needs and health issues and put things in place.

For my poor interoception, 2-3ltrs of water a day so I don't confuse hunger and thirst.

For my ADHD: Ashwagandha to help curb my cortisol levels. A low dose of SSRIs to keep my serotonin up so I don't crave quick fixes.

I take medication and supplements to manage my medical conditions so I don't feel tired or sad and go for quick fixes for energy or to cheer me up.

I don't eat any of my trigger foods. (I've found that if I need a treat, ice cream doesn't set off my need for more sugar.) I prioritise protein to keep my energy levels steady.

I keep away from my usual 'all or nothing' mentality. If I slip, I get back to it as soon as possible. If I can't exercise, I don't let my nutrition slip.

Every day is still a battle. Some are worse than others, but I'm hopeful that it will get easier with time. Last time, I made it to 90 days without over half of these things in place.

[polyamorousmood]

Hey! I’m so sorry if you don’t respond to asks like this but I was wondering if I could get a little advice?

I’ve been with my boyfriend for nearly 8 months now and I went into it making it clear that I was poly and he knew that (hes monogamous) and we’ve been talking about compromises around being a poly relationship. He keeps on sort of swinging between being okay with it and then getting sort of self conscious. The way he sees it is that if he was to date someone outside of me then I’d need to date someone else so it’s fair but if I was to date someone outside of him that we both weren’t dating then he’d be anxious about me leaving him.

I’m not trying to invalidate how he feels because I understand how terrifying something like this can be and I get that a lot of this stems from being cheated on in a previous relationship and that he is quite an anxious/ self conscious person. I just don’t know how to help him see that I love him and even if Ryan Reynolds himself stared dating me I wouldn’t leave him because he feels like my forever partner you know? God this turned into a rant I’m sorry

This is a late response, and I've answered similar questions before, so I recommend checking those out for further reading📚 (especially this one), but there are a few key🔑 points I want to emphasize for you specifically

Start taking time apart now. Regular time ⌚where you are unavailable (and out of the house). This will be common if you get another partner, and it is only one more thing for your boyfriend's brain to go "this is different than usual, they're pulling away, this is a problem, AAAAAAA" if its not normal. Its made much easier if you being unavailable sometimes is normal. Take a cooking class or become a regular at the library or something.

You will never be able to completely assure him you won't leave. This is one of those things that's a bitch to hear, but its true. And would be true even if you were monogamous. Your boyfriend probably needs to do some independent work on that (I really like this worksheet📃✍️, done slowly). That doesn't mean you shouldn't reassure him you're in this for the long haul! That doesn't mean you shouldn't still help! Just that you cannot 100% solve the problem, no matter how committed you are.

Don't let him waffle forever. This is so much easier said than done. And you should allow him some space to sort this out, because it is a lot for most people! But you made this clear from the beginning, and if you wake up one day and suddenly you've been dating him exclusively for 4 years and he's still not sure... something went wrong. Express to him that - while you understand his concerns - it does still hurt to be in limbo, or that he'd doubt your love so much, or whatever else about it is hard for you. Its a tricky balance⚖️ to strike, but you can and should be able to express your feelings while respecting his.

"The way he sees it is that if he was to date someone outside of me then I’d need to date someone else so it’s fair" do you feel this way?? If not, tell him to cut it out with putting extra restrictions on it lol

Best of luck, my friend. 🍀 You can do this!! And so can your boyfriend!

[team-canon]

I refuse to do it badly no matter what you ask.

Persona is a game series about exploring the human psyche. People always joke about the anime tropes and the dating sim aspects, but it makes it work better in my opinion, because the characters being archetypal and having a mechanic designed to let you get to know them better makes that exploration of the psyche much easier. You see these characters at their best and worst, and it reflects in the form of unnatural entities created by the subconscious; Shadows, which are a dark and bastardized caricature of the person's innermost secret they don't want to share, and Personas, entities that a person can create from within themselves, forged from those same inner feelings and fueled by accepting them, which does its creator's bidding and has the power to harm the Shadows and other creatures inside the "other world"(for lack of a better term) that exists in a different form in each game.

The Persona as a concept is a whole discussion on its own, but in simplest terms, there's several hundred, some of them specialized to and only used by one person, others able to manifest for anyone that can go through the arcane process that allows their use. Regardless, the Persona's name, appearance, and power all comes from various folklore characters throughout history and culture, a part of the collective will of mankind

In Persona 1, the entire town is plunged into the other world of that particular game, and the main character Naoya has to get his school back in order while he and his friends work their way through the complex mystery of why all this happened in the first place.

Persona 2 is in two parts, Innocent Sin and Eternal Punishment. IS is about the new protagonist Tatsuya, a reporter named Maya, Tatsuya's classmates, and some of the party members from Persona 1, all trying to figure out what happened in the town of the setting, that causes people's wishes and rumors to come true at the cost of reality bending further and further. EP takes place a year or two later, with Maya as the protagonist, working to uncover why no one else remembers what happened in Innocent Sin, and why the same type of events are happening all over again

Some people think Persona 3 is the real start, but that's a weak stance. That said, 3 is where the social elements get introduced, so I appreciate it all the same. The story follows a boy named Minato, or, as an option in the PSP version, a girl named Hamuko, who moved to a dorm in a new city, and discovers that the other kids in the dorm, like Minato himself, have the ability to use a Persona, and they all have been tasked with using their power to investigate the massive dungeon tower known as Tartarus, believed to be the taproot of the Shadows that plague humanity every midnight. But the real fun is that, because it's only a nighttime problem, in the day when everything is normal, Minato can go to school, take tests, do part time jobs, go on dates, and bond with friends, and in doing so better understand other people and himself, and through these crafted bonds awaken the power to summon and wield more Personas, becoming more and more powerful during the Shadow Hunts.

Persona 4 sees Yu, the protagonist, going to live with his uncle Dojima and(painfully cute) cousin Nanako for a school year. In the small town they live in, he and some friends he make find that there's another world, accessed by going into a TV, where Shadows swarm them, Yu can summon a Persona to fight those Shadows, and also there's a giant talking teddy bear that people either love or hate. At the same time as that, mysterious murders have been happening in the town, which the bear helps Yu and crew figure out have been done inside the world within the TV, so the students band together to use the power of Persona to explore inside the TV and find out who the killer is. But on the way, they discover what was hinted at in earlier titles: Shadows are created directly from the darkest thoughts of a person, and inside the other world, a Shadow can form themselves to look like a person and goad the one they look like into doing things they wouldn't normally do

Persona 5 goes the opposite way fro. 4, sort of. Ren is the protagonist, sent to a different city after getting in trouble with the law, made to stay with a friend of his parents who doesn't trust him, and made to feel like an outcast in the school he's sent to, he and other outcasts find a talking cat, and that cat leads them to a place that he tells them is made by the human collective unconscious. In this place, everyone has a mask put on them, and Shadows roam halls of places called Palaces, bastions of indulgence where a person's belief of themselves being something creates a reality where a Shadow if them is that for real. And when Ren and the other outcasts remove their masks, remove the representation of the facade out up by society's rules, the mask becomes a Persona that can fight against the Shadows, and if the one that created the Palace is defeated, the person who made it will give up on what lifestyle choices they made to reach that point. With this, the outcasts become the Phantom Thieves of Hearts, and vow to pull heists on the Palaces of people they feel have wronged them or society in some way, to make them give up on their poor actions and confess to their crimes, with the ultimate goal of going after the corrupt politician who was the reason Ren came here in the first place

There's a lot more. A LOT more. But this is the simplest description I could do. If you want more, we can talk in PM, or you can ask someone who can speak more concisely

Someone explain the Persona games to me, someone who knows nothing about Persona.

[dan-crimes]

Mfs can't understand a blunt mf they always gotta try and read between the lines or straight up deny the words you're saying and deny how you feel

[slowlyfoggydestiny]

Soo it happen again huh

[phagodyke]

.

[louisa-gc]

how to start reading again

from someone who was a voracious reader until high school and is now getting back into it in her twenties.

start with an old favourite. even though it felt a little silly, i re-read the harry potter series one christmas and it wiped away my worry that i wasn't capable of reading anymore. they are long books, but i was still able to get completely immersed and to read just as fast as i had years and years ago.

don't be afraid of "easier" books. before high school i was reading the french existentialists, but when getting back into reading, i picked up lucinda riley and sally rooney. not my favourite authors by far, but easier to read while not being totally terrible. i needed to remind myself that only choosing classics would not make me a better or smarter person. if a book requires a slower pace of reading to be understood, it's easier to just drop it, which is exactly what i wanted to avoid at first.

go for essays and short stories. no need to explain this one: the shorter the whole, the less daunting it is. i definitely avoided all books over 350 pages at first and stuck to essay collections until i suddenly devoured donna tartt's goldfinch.

remember it's okay not to finish. i was one of those people who finished every book they started, but not anymore! if i pick up a book at the library and after a few chapters realise i'd rather not read it, i just return it. (another good reason to use your local library! no money spent on books you might end up disliking.)

analyse — or don't. some people enjoy reading more when they take notes or really stop to think about the contents. for me, at first, it was more important to build the habit of reading, and the thought of analysing what i read felt daunting. once i let go of that expectation, i realised i naturally analyse and process what i read anyway.

read when you would usually use your phone. just as i did when i was a child, i try to read when eating, in the bathroom, on public transport, right before sleeping. i even read when i walk, because that's normally a time i stare at my screen anyway. those few pages you read when you brush your teeth and wait for a friend very quickly stack up.

finish the chapter. if you have time, try to finish the part you're reading before closing the book. usually i find i actually don't want to stop reading once i get to the end of a chapter — and if i do, it feels like a good place to pick up again later.

try different languages. i was quickly approaching a reading slump towards the end of my exchange year, until i realised i had only had access to books in english and that, despite my fluency, i was tired of the language. so as soon as i got back home i started picking up books in my native tongue, which made reading feel much easier and more fun again! after some nine months, i'm starting to read in english again without it feeling like a huge task.

forget what's popular. i thought social media would be a fun way to find interesting books to read, but i quickly grew frustrated after hating every single book i picked up on some influencer's recommendation. it's certainly more time-consuming to find new books on your own, but this way i don't despise every novel i pick up.

remember it isn't about quantity. the online book community's endless posts about reading 150 books each year or 6 books in a single day easily make us feel like we're slow, bad readers, but here's the thing: it does not matter at all how many books you read or what your reading pace is. we all lead different lives, just be proud of yourself for reading at all!

stop stressing about it. we all know why reading is important, and since the pandemic reading has become an even more popular hobby than it was before (which is wonderful!). however, there's no need to force yourself to be "a reader". pick up a book every now and then and keep reading if you enjoy it, but not reading regularly doesn't make you any less of a good person. i find the pressure to become "a person who reads" or to rediscover my inner bookworm only distances me from the very act of reading.

[felixbit]

chestnut

pairing: hyunjin x gn!reader w. 0.8k genre: comedic fluff summary: your boyfriend, hyunjin, comes home on christmas day from sbs gayo daejeon after surprising you with a new look. he's shaved his hair and gone blonde. warnings: reader mourns the long hair but is very supportive. playful teasing a/n: this is literally just how i'm coping rn

New year and comeback season always meant new looks and fresh things. However, this was not expected.

You were at home, as always. Christmas was a busy day for Hyunjin, away at SBS Gayo Daejeon performing and looking pretty for the cameras. It was routine, but you always enjoyed tuning in and seeing the talent from him and his group as they performed.

There was a red carpet to unveil looks, but you were preparing some food for dinner that night. Things were getting hectic in the kitchen and time passed you by.

But your phone started to buzz. And buzz. And buzz.

Unable to ignore the repeating notification noises, you stopped what you were doing to figure out what had your phone blowing up. Notifications from posts and texts from friends... what was happening?

Everyone was talking about Hyunjin. As normal as it was for him to get the world's attention, the sheer amount of notifications was concerning. Something was obviously going on.

So, you opened your feed. It didn't take more than a single scroll for the picture to hit your timeline. On the red carpet, looking sharp and stunning, was Hyunjin. Beautiful outfit, many piercings, eyebrow slit fresh.

Oh, and his head was completely shaved and dyed blonde.

You stared at your phone in shock for what felt like forever. The two second clip of him looking stunning for the cameras replayed over and over as your brain tried to pick up the pieces.

You knew he wouldn't have his phone on him and able to look at it for a bit, but that did not stop you from blowing up his texts. Nothing outrageous or upset, but a lot of spammed questions and confusion got the message across pretty well. It was the least you could do.

Reeling from the overwhelming knowledge of your boyfriend's look, you decided to put your phone down and get back to cooking. You had to take your mind off of it or you might go insane.

The whole time, all you could think about was him. How drastic it was, how hot he looked, the whole bit. Hwang Hyunjin was taking up your entire mind.

Any task that you tried to do seemed impossible to entirely focus on. Every moment had you wanting to grab your phone and scroll, finding every possible photo of him. Hyunjin being a world-famous idol did not make this any easier.

Giving in, you resigned to doom scrolling. If you weren't able to focus, you wouldn't get anything done. Might as well just drool over how good he looks, you thought.

When he finally got done with the show, he was able to text you back briefly. He returned your texts with spam of his own, a bunch of apologies and letting you know when he'd be back.

Waiting for him to come home seemed impossible. The performance that the group gave was phenomenal as always. However, nothing could prepare you for seeing the look in person. Time passed dreadfully slow.

As you had finished up dinner, you heard the door swing open. You turned around to see Hyunjin out of breath. He waved to you, a shy smile on his face as he hung up his coat and took off his shoes. He approached slowly, looking uncertain.

"Do you... like it?" He finally asked, his voice shaky and small.

Staring at him for a few seconds, you smiled and nodded. "Of course I do, but why didn't you tell me?"

"It was supposed to be a surprise! A Christmas gift, you know?" Hyunjin tried to explain, breathing still heavy from running, "I thought it was a really big change, and I was worried you'd say no."

You looked at him incredulously. "Why would I say no to you wanting to try something new?"

"I... don't know." Hyunjin climbed into a chair, tilting his head back and closing his eyes as he fully caught his breath.

You watched him for a few moments, quietly observing his new look for yourself. He looked stunning, his sharp features accentuated by the new hair and the piercings grabbing your eye.

Although, you had something on your mind. "Oh, your poor hair," You lamented jokingly, "If you had warned me, I would've cherished it more if I knew it was the last time I'd see it."

"Aish, you'll see it again," Hyunjin groaned, standing up and looking at you, "Just not for a while."

"You better grow it back out," You retorted, walking over and running your fingers through his soft, short hair.

Hyunjin grinned and shrugged his shoulders. "We'll see."

"Hwang Hyunjin."

"Okay, okay, sorry."

As you plated your dinner with him, you looked over and snickered. "God, you really do look like a chestnut. Changbin was right."

"What did he call me?" Hyunjin scoffed, "I'm not a chestnut."

"Chestnut, dumpling, flour boy. You're becoming the real grocery list."

"I am not!"

[pleasantlycrazyworld]

Sex pollen

A/N: Reader is female, also a mutant with logan like powers. Logan calls the reader princess, darling, and his girl. Unprotected sex (Please don't be stupid and do this). I had a few requests for this, and i figured why not post it on Halloween! Happy Halloween to everyone who celebrates, I hope you enjoy the smut. I worked hard on it, but I'm not the best smut writer, lol. Request are open for Logan and Bucky! And I'm very close to 1,000 followers, so I might try and do some sort of special for it <3

********************************************

Logan should've listened to you when you said something was going to go wrong during the mission. "I don't know Lo, I just have this feeling that I can't seem to shake" you whined and grabbed his arm trying to get him to reconsider and have Charles send someone else for the mission, but he just disregarded you completely. He was just too stubborn, too proud for his own good, and it was really biting him in the ass now.

The mission was supposed to be normal, just a quick in and out. Get into the abandoned laboratory, do a quick scan to make sure it is abandoned, and then steal the plans for mutant mass destruction. Simple, something he's done a million times before but as he sits in the jet panting, sweating, nearly moaning in discomfort, he realizes how badly he fucked up. Fuck when is she ever wrong? Why didn't you just listen to her?! He groaned internally as he looked at the time, only a few more minutes than he'd be home in your bed, with you in his arms... with his cock deep in your pussy. He let a loud moan fall from his lips as he started to think of your body, fuck did he need you.

You were pacing waiting for Logan to come back from the mission, "Where is he? He should've been home hours ago!" You were beyond worried and frustrated over the whole situation, technically you knew that Logan would always come back home to you but that doesn't make the wait easier, it doesn't make seeing him bloody and aching easier either.

The front door finally opened and slammed shut. Logan's heavy footsteps could easily be heard echoing through the hall, "Logan!" You rushed to him to start checking for any injuries. Before you could ask him if he was okay, Logan pulled you into a deep, feverish kiss.

Logan groaned as he felt you gasp against his lips; his hands started to wander up your shirt as he walked you to your shared bedroom, trying his hardest not to break the kiss. You are the first to pull away,completely breathless and a bit confused."Logan...fuck baby what's going on?" You asked as his lips trailed down your neck, leaving rough bites in their place. "Need you, need your skin on mine, need your pussy choking my cock" he cut himself off with a broken moan as he starts to grind his throbbing cock into your thigh, making you feel how hard he was. "Princess, please." He begged completely helpless.

You were worried, Logan had never acted this way before, never whined or begged, but you'd be a liar if you said it didn't make you wet hearing his deep voice beg for you.

Logan was pawing at your clothes before he finally decided to just rip them off completely. Before you could whine to him about your clothes being ripped, he silenced you with a kiss and promised to buy a new outfit for you. "I'll buy you whatever you want princess, just need to see you, need to see my pretty pussy." He moans pitifully when he does get a glimpse at your sex. "Fucking christ darlin' look how wet you are, all this for me?"

You nodded quickly and pulled him closer, "Logan please, need you in me, fuck me please I need it, need to feel you deep in me for the rest of the week." Your begging made his knees weak, it sounded like heaven to him, and who was he to deny you of what you wanted.

"Whatever, you need princess," he assured you with a smirk as he pulled away to finally undress completely. Your eyes widen seeing how hard he was, "Fucking hell Lo..." You muttered quietly knowing he would still hear you. "Does my girl need me?" He asked crawling up the bed, kissing the skin exposed as he moved further up your body.

When he finally reached your mouth, he gave you a sweet kiss as he slowly thrust into you. Oh, oh my fucking--! He groaned internally as he felt your warm walls stretch around him. You broke the kiss to moan his name, throwing your head back.

You ended up moving your hands to his shoulder to hold on to him better as he thrusted more erratic, and without noticing, your claws slowly started to appear from your nails. Before you could notice, they ended up digging into his shoulder muscle deeply. An animalistic moan ripped from his chest as he felt your claws draw blood. His hips moved on their own, in and out, into your warmth and out for a split second before plunging back into you faster and deeper than before. It was like his hips were moving faster than his mind could keep up, and the only thing he could think about was you.

Your warmth, your softness, your smell, your taste. You were the only thing on his mind. He could feel his eyes roll back as his orgasm approaches. With his eyes closed, he could feel every inch of you. It was like he could feel each one of your atoms against his.

His eyes fluttered open when he heard you whimper louder than before. "Fuck you're so pretty darlin, sound so pretty for me...need more, need you to cum." He moaned before he could finish his sentence. "I really, really need you to cum on my cock princess, need you to milk me. Take it, take it all from me princess it's yours." He grunted and moved your legs to be over his shoulders, given him a new angle to thrust even deeper than before. You screamed his name as you came on his cock. He leaned down to have your chest press together as he prepared to cum deep in your pussy, "Gonna cum-fuck gonna cum deep in my pussy, keep you full for a while then when it's dripped out, I'll fuck you again to keep you full all over again." His pelvis rubbed against your clit, making you clench around him even tighter than before thanks to the overstimulation he was giving you. Feeling you get even tighter made Logan moan out and finally give in before cumming as deep as he possibly could.

It felt like an eternity before Logan finally stopped cumming. He collapsed on top of you, completely breathless and his limbs felt numb. "Holy...fuck darling" he nearly giggles as he basks in his afterglow, in all of his life he cannot remember a time where he ever came like that. "I don't think I'd ever fucked that good before" he said kissing the bruises that he could reach that was slowly disappearing on your skin.

You sighed happily, feeling his lips on your skin. You started to play with his hair softly as you hummed in agreement. You couldn't remember ever having sex that intensely before. "What did you get into on that mission?" You asked curiously, and he shrugged. "Not much. There was this pink powder that poofed in my face, though." He said as if it meant nothing, "Logan!" You tried to look at him to see if he was drugged in some sort of way but before you could, you could feel his cock hardening inside you all over again.

Logan moved to have you caged between his arms once again and asked with a knowing smirk, "Round two?"

Well how could you say no to that?...

Tagging:

@userchai

@mahi-tamashi

@100percentlazybonez

@lanassmarty

@western-pyro

@misscrissfemmefatale

@marit332

@navs-bhat

@fluffy-b33z

@chaimshelii

@aoi-targaryen

@eyes-ofhell

@sad0ni0n

@fries11

@slowlikehoneyyy

@iamburdened

@brisinggamenwearer

[waughymommy]

Diaper Discipline Guide

Emma & Henry

My boyfriend of 4 years has always had regressive and sub tendencies while I’ve wanted to talk more control in our relationship. We tried several bdsm activities including smacking and bondage but the occasional nature wasn’t really doing it for me.

After finding out more online about Female Led Relationships I came across DD, initially dismissing it. But the more I read, the better and better the idea appealed to me. After some planning I decided to confront my partner and say I wanted to add an element of control and domination into our relationship, by saying I hadn’t decided how to do it yet we had a long discussion without diapers being mentioned where he agreed in principle to “lifestyle dominance” as long as it could be kept between them and not impact his job, friends, etc. 

This guide was invaluable to me to plan the rest and it solidified my decision. It took me two weeks to discreetly buy the required supplies, getting them delivered to our apartment on days he was at work. I decided that I wanted a high initial level of DD where he’d be in diapers 24/7 at home.

I decided to start on a Friday night after work. He’d known that I had been preparing for something and I started the conversation by saying my proposal was weird, reassuring him that it wouldn’t be painful/harmful and nobody else would find out but you wanted him to agree to try it for at least 6 weeks.

Although nervous he also seemed excited by the prospect and agreed. We moved to the bedroom where I told him to get undressed before I diapered him for the first time. There was a lot of objections at this stage but I talked him round and the agreement to try it for 6 weeks was helpful.

To make the shock less I started with a medical diaper which wasn’t too thick and let him wear his normal pjs over it. I left him to explore it on his own while going to make dinner. After dinner it was time to tell him all the rules, the main one was that the toilet at home was now banned and he’d be in diapers whenever he’s at home. I kept the baby elements to a minimum and said he’s have to also wear out the house sometimes but I’d make sure nobody could tell and never when he’s at work or with friends/family. I’m not going to lie and say this didn’t involve an argument, especially when he realised that no toilet meant #2 as well but we got through. We ended up watching a movie which was a good way for him to calm down.

He wet his diaper for the first time after the movie which was funny to watch as he was so nervous it was going to leak everywhere. Even though it wasn’t too wet I did change him straight away and made his change extra special too. That night he slept in a diaper for the first time.

Over the first weekend he did get more used to wearing and I allowed him to use the toilet for a bm on Saturday. Sunday however I decided to fully enforce the rules and he messed himself for the first time. I didn’t change him this time and he took a shower. There was a lot of protests again but I said it was none-negotiable. The smell did seem to be the biggest thing that bothered him so I bought some Devrom tablets which had been recommended, it took a few days for them to arrive and a few more of taking them but now his messy diapers hardly smell and the protests have stopped. I’d actually recommend you use these from day 1 to make the transition easier.

The first week was tough but we got through it and I’m happy to say we’re now 7 months in to him being in DD. Over that time I’ve moved to thicker abdl diapers, he wears onesies regularly around the house and the toilet has remained unused by him with only a few exceptions.

We both work mainly from home so I’ve gotten used to checking and changing his diaper but thick diapers + devrom has meant he generally only needs a change after waking up, sometime in the early afternoon and before bed. I’ll also let him change himself if I’m busy or cba. 

The best news is after an initial rocky patch, our relationship feels stronger than ever! He proposed to me 5 months in and I can’t see his DD ending any time soon. I’ve increased elements overtime and now the toilet is banned even when out of the house together. Public wearing did take him a while to get used to but actually it’s easy. 

I’m sure DD is not for everyone and is much more involved and hard work than other lifestyle changes but for creating a caring bond between you and your partner I’ve found it to be great!

[dhampir-dyke]

[caitlinsnicket]

ekko relationship headcanons

warnings: smut at some points, pretty sure it's just a handjob and a few suggestive comments, that's it.

a/n: i still got one exam left but i managed to birth this. he's a very sensitive topic for me, do NOT even mention him to me I am SAD goodbye

Calls you a bunch of nicknames all day long but freezes the second you give him the same treatment. Call him pookie once, and he'll just stare back at you, not really knowing what to do.

He's slick when he wants to be: talking lower and lower so you have to get closer to him, placing his hands near your body but never actually touching you, staring right into your eyes and then glancing at your lips, letting his eyes wander over your figure until you're shifting under his gaze.

Still, he flirts but always waits for you to initiate actual contact, like kissing or hugging/cuddling (at least in the beginning). It's both a show of how much effect he has over you and a silent question of whether or not you actually want to touch him.

The casualness of your touch sends him reeling. He loves the way you'll just brush his cheek to remove some dust out of nowhere, pull a few of his locks back from his face when he's talking to you, or straighten his clothes for him while telling him what you want for dinner.

He gets bashful quickly whenever you start touching him or talking to him near his face, and after a while—even if you've been together for some time—he just gets overwhelmed by your closeness and almost always loses focus. You have to call him a few times so he can get his mind off your lips and try to keep the warmth of his cheeks under control.

He's clearly touch-starved, and you realize this because whenever you hold his cheeks or just brush your arm against his, he chases after it, his eyes glazing over and twitching slightly in place. You make it your personal mission to keep him as content as you can, and that means touching him all the time, at any moment, for no apparent reason.

Whenever he's wearing crop tops, you run your fingers over his skin until he's shivering and almost whimpering, his belly rising and falling rapidly with your warmth around him. His hands grip the nearby table, and he bites his lip, bucking his hips up to meet your hand. It can go one of two ways: you keep going until he's coming all over your hand, teeth biting into the skin of your neck as he works through the aftershocks, or you give him a peck on the lips and leave him all hot and bothered.

Either way, what bliss.

He likes holding your hand at all times: while he tinkers, while flying around, while having dinner, in bed before falling asleep. Sometimes you'll let go because it gets too clammy, and he proceeds to grab your other one. He kisses your fingertips and knuckles and lets your intertwined hands rest near his face for a second, just enjoying your warmth.

He's always touching you in some way and feels really good (proud) whenever you return his affections in public. At the same time that he gets shy and understands that his life is not all sunshine and rainbows, he still allows himself to enjoy these quiet moments, like he's a normal guy in a normal world.

One day, you're alone in his lab, applying the white paint he loves so much on his face, being so near and yet so far. When you're done, you hover in front of him, your hands still dirty, getting closer and closer by the second. He tilts his head up to meet yours, just a little, but just enough.

And then he needs a second, just holding you a few inches from him, taking his time to get ready for your lips. He wants to do it right, and he gets so worried about it that he almost forgets what he's about to do until you pull his hands up to your face and kiss his palms, telling him that it's okay.

He pulls you closer then, touching your lips with his own, incredibly warm, and then he lets you lead. Going with the flow is easier for him than taking the lead right away. When you touch his neck, trying to get as much of him as you possibly can, his eyebrows furrow, and he almost loses balance. Please, he thinks, keep touching me.

After that, whenever you kiss him, he's just a mess. He usually rests his hands on your waist, arms, or face, never letting them wander too far without being sure you're willing to go there too, and his face warms profusely whenever you take his hand and push it lower.

He also lives for the casual pecks throughout the day, when you're just passing by or when you're about to leave him to do something else. If you happen to wear lipstick, his cheeks will receive a colorful, sticky look from how much you kiss them. He might pretend to forget about it just to parade your mark around.

After a while into the relationship, he's not as fidgety, but still feels his heart race whenever you lean in to kiss him.

Whenever it's raining (and it's actually safe to go outside), he grabs you by the hand to run around in it, splashing you with the puddles on the ground, grabbing you and spinning you around until both of you are dizzy. Then he kisses you with wet lips and cold cheeks.

His favorite part is after, when the two of you take off your wet clothes to dry off. The intimacy of being able to take care of you in your most vulnerable state makes him feel good about himself.

He loves dancing too, pulling you to him even when there's no music, swaying from side to side—sometimes slowly, sometimes quickly—but always hiding his face in your neck to feel as close to you as he physically can. He especially loves it when you hold him back as hard as you can, singing along to a song or murmuring a melody you remember, as a reassurance that you need him as much as he needs you.

Taking naps around the firelight base, or just on the tree itself, his arm over your belly as your heads are turned in each other's direction. The warmth of the little sun that filters down there keeps both of you comfortable for a long time. Sometimes you wake up and it's already dark, making the two of you laugh.

He kisses your forehead and pulls you close, his head just above yours, hugging you tighter when you give him a light kiss on his neck. His heart beats in the same rhythm as yours.

[meiyudo]

Baby Fever

Anakin x f!reader

This is based off of number 2 of this list :)- I havent really delved into kink writing s sorry if this isnt the best haha- think of the reader as a padme- type figure

After seeing you interact with a lost child- Anakin thinks it’s time you had your own baby to look after…

warnings: P in V, smex, ani has a mean breeding kink, multiple orgasms, mentiond of pregnancy

________________

Floods of invigorating politicians and citizens exited the large Coruscant city center after a successful senate meeting. You had just finished pitching a plan that would excel the economy while also protecting labor’s rights. 

You smiled as you stood from your podium once the majority of the crowds had exited- the whole public eye thing was a bit new to you. 

For the longest time you worked behind the scenes helping other politicians with similar goals; it wasn’t until a few months ago that you, yourself, were appointed as your district’s senator. 

You fixed your dress as you exited your booth and headed for the dimly lit corridors of the massive building. Most of the clamor had moved outside into the city square so the halls were mostly empty. 

As you turned the corner a small smile found its way onto your face once you saw a familiar figure leaning against a marble pillar. Unmistakable robes and lightsaber clipped to the man’s belt. 

“I wasn’t aware Jedi had any interest in politics” you said with a smirk as the man snaked a gloved arm around you before you could pass. 

He pressed his face into your hair as he hugged you tighter to his chest, “We don’t, but you know all of my interest belongs to you”. 

You sighed as he pressed a passionate kiss to the column of your neck. 

“Ani- not here” you almost whimpered. 

He quickly twirled you around to face him before holding your face in his hands, “why not?” he asked with a charming smirk- “we should let them all know”. 

He glanced out the large windows down at the crowds of excited civilians- from up here they looked no larger than ants running for a sugar jar. 

“They all love you, so why can’t I?” Anakin asked with a pout. 

You sweetly smiled before placing a tender kiss to his pretty lips, “you can, and you do- you know the ramifications Anakin, you know we ca-“. 

Anakin cut you off with another deep kiss before releasing you and playfully slapping your ass. 

“Yeah yeah, I know” he huffed, “but they don’t know that”. 

You rolled your eyes at your lover’s childish desires before leading him out of the building. 

To avoid the spotlight and attention of the crowds, you dawned a hooded cloak before exiting the center.

Anakin followed closely behind; a hand already on his saber just in case. Thankfully being in public with Anakin seemed normal to some degree because you had become such a public figure- Jedi were often tasked with protecting political officials.

So Anakin looked no different than a routine bodyguard. 

The crowds were easier to navigate now that you had some practice under your belt. You had almost made it to your reserved speeder when you felt a small tug on the hem of your long dress. 

You smiled once you realized the tugging was coming from a small child, probably no older than four. 

She looked up at you with wonder as she mustered up the courage to speak to you. 

“Senator?” She finally asked. 

You nodded with a smile before turning to her. A wide grin settled onto her small face as she looked you up and down. 

“Pretty” she giggled. 

Anakin stood a few feet behind you, trying to see what was going on over the people standing in the way- he became anxious when you dipped from view.

The Jedi quickly weaved through the remaining people to see you crouched down speaking to a small child. His expression immediately softened as he watched you interact so sweetly with the girl; making exaggerated faces at the child’s comments, pointing out her cute accessories to make her giggle, picking her up to shield her from oncoming pedestrians-

Anakin never really thought about having kids- of course he wanted them someday; he wanted to create life with you and wanted to raise his children with a childhood he never got to have. But it never seemed like the right time.

The two of you had been careful when engaging in those activities to avoid an unexpected surprise when you still hadn’t quite figured out how to navigate your secret relationship. 

But each time Anakin fucked you he got closer and closer to giving up on the unspoken rule; he got closer and closer to cumming deep inside of you without any intention of pulling out. 

You knew Anakin was a passionate lover but you never considered that your sweet, respectful Jedi lover fantasized about locking you into a mating press while he fucked his children into your fertile womb. 

Anakin had no timeline of when he wanted them, but he knew you’d make a great mother no matter how long (or short) he waited.

Though seeing you interact in real time just made him want the fantasy to spring to reality. 

_________

“Hello sweetie, where are your parents?” You cooed at the small girl in your arms. 

She giggled and shrugged, making you frown. 

“Well that’s not good, they’re probably worried about you” you said, scanning the crowd for anyone who held any semblance to the tiny child in your arms. 

She, on the other hand, had no interest in finding her guardians- instead she was focused on the shiny tinsel that had been put into your hair prior to your speech. Innocently, she flipped your hood off and began to touch your face as she admired your beauty in childlike wonder. 

Before you could react, Anakin was by your side; he gently placed the cloak back over your head to protect you from interested onlookers. 

“Ani! You came out of nowhere” you giggled lightheartedly as he guided you off to the side of the still buzzing city square. 

“Who’s this?” He asked with a smile as the little girl in your arms hid her face in your shoulder. 

“It’s ok baby, he’s a Jedi- he’s very strong and he’s here to protect us” you whispered to the little girl in your arms. 

“Jedi?” her green eyes brightened as she became excited at the title. 

She continued asking you questions but all Anakin could focus on was how beautiful you looked interacting with such a young child. How natural you looked. 

Is this how you would interact with your own children? With his children?

He couldn't help but adjust his pants as he felt them becoming increasingly tighter. 

Soon the overexcited child had fallen asleep in your comforting arms; shortly, you began cautiously walking around in hopes to find her parents. The jedi beside you watched as you subconsciously brushed the girl's hair and gently bounced her on your hip. 

Before long you finally stumbled across two very worried adults calling for who you could only assume was fast asleep in your arms. 

“Oh Maker! There she is!” the woman gasped as she reached for her baby. 

The Man she was with breathed out a sigh of relief and quickly joined her as you handed her the sleeping child. 

“Thank you so mu- Senator!” the man’s eyes widened once he realized who it was. 

“We are so sorry to have troubled you- please forgive us for our carelessness” the woman bowed. 

“No, no! It was no trouble at all- you have a beautiful daughter” you smiled, brushing a stray strand of hair away from the girl’s face. 

“Thank you, thank you so much. We loved your speech- you are just what this city needs” the mother offered before turning to her husband. 

You bowed and met the silent figure watching from the sidelines; “Sorry Ani, we can go now”. 

Anakin just nodded silently and trailed you with an uncharacteristically dazed aura. 

Once you were in your speeder, Anakin hopped in the driver’s seat and jetted off towards your apartment; his strong jaw clenched as he imagined you full with a child.

He flinched as you placed a tender hand on his tensed thigh, “Ani- are you alright?”.

________________________

A cacophony of moans and groans ricocheted off of the walls of your penthouse bedroom as your lover continuously plunged his cock in and out of your abused hole. He had been at it for two hours already and had already cum once (while you came thrice). 

Once you entered your private apartment, all of his carefully crafted will-power snapped and he went feral; the natural urge to breed you, hit him like a bus.

He was all over you; your lips, neck, breasts, cunt- you were his and he was going to make damn sure it stayed that way. 

“A-Ani! S-slow down!” you cried as he jetted his thick cock in and out of you. 

“S-Sorry baby, C-can’t- I gotta- gotta fill you up” he winced as he fucked you through his own overstimulation. 

His heavy balls slapped against your ass and a ring of foam from your combined juices formed at the base of his cock. 

He already came inside of you once, what more could he want?

“Baby- t’s too much! You're-spilling all over”.

“N-no, not enough- gotta fuck a baby into you” he grunted against your bruised neck. 

His confession had your eyes snapping open, “What?!”. 

“Looked too damn good with that baby on your hip- I-I wanna see you with my child on your hip in-instead” he babbled as he pulled you flush against his chest and rutted his desperate hips into yours. 

So that's what this was all about. 

Admittedly you didn’t mind his desires, deep down you wanted the same thing… you wanted him to reach so deep that he fucked one into you on the spot. 

“Oh Fuck Ani- I wan- I want your kids” you admitted ad you raked your long nails down his toned back. 

“Shit babe- squeezing me so tight” he whined as he gripped onto your hips with a caging grasp (surely you would be bruised tomorrow). 

He slammed his hips flush against yours with intense force as he felt the coil in his stomach begin to snap- this was it, this was the orgasm that was going to give you a child. 

He just knew it. 

“Ahh c-cumming! Gonna give y-you a child- Shit! i-i ‘m going to fuck my baby into you” he babbled as he felt his hot, thick, warm seed shoot out of his oversensitive tip into your gushing cunt as your own orgasm washed over your like a crest-fallen wave. 

“Ani!” you cried as your legs began to shake from the overpowering climax mixed with your exhaustion. 

You clawed onto him so hard that you swore you drew blood. Anakin, on the other hand, dove down and captured you into a tight embrace; his mechanical hand making you gasp at the sudden coolness. 

His body shook with pleasure and overstimulation as he struggled to rut his hips into you to push the last bit of spend further into you with shaky breaths. 

Once you came down from your high, you were so tired that you couldn’t even bother to ask Anakin to clean you up; you half expected him to fall asleep inside of you based on how tired he also looked. 

“Gonna make you a mommy- you’ll look s-so good- so round with our child” Anakin mumbled into your neck before slowly turning over so that you were on top of him (his dick still inside). 

You hummed in contempt before drifting to sleep as he gently brushed your hair with hsi flesh hand. 

“The two of you should get some sleep now- I love you” Anakin whispered before drifting right after you. 

You would have giggled at Anakin’s addition of “two” when speaking to you and your hypothetical baby, but as usual your lover was right. 

The famed “Jedi perception” was affirmed 9 months later when you cradled not one, but two small bundles of joy. You sat on your couch as you fed your children and Anakin couldn't help but smirk at the scene before him, this is just what he wanted… he couldn’t wait till you could have another one. 

***

(a/n: ngl im not crazy big on kids but breeding is hot 🤭🤭 hope this lived up to the idea on the list :0)

[omega-e123]

!! NSFW !!

cw: mild somnophilia(?), Cunnilingus, Vaginal sex. Fingering. Breeding kink.

In A Rut…

Prologue || Restraint || Part 3 (HERE) || Adoration

Indulgence

Depressed. Lonely. Unwanted. Those are the words that you’d describe how you’re feeling. You knew Shadow liked his personal space, but isn’t this a bit much? After being the only one initiating for a month straight, it’s finally taken its toll on you.

Rationally, you’re aware if Shadow didn’t at least tolerate your company, he wouldn’t give you the time of day. Let alone reciprocate affection when given. It still hurt, putting in all the effort suddenly.

It’s been a while since the last time you spent the night at his place. Not from the lack of asking. Shadow shot down every time it was brought up. The way he answered differed. Sometimes it was a flat, “No.” Other times he would go silent, deep into thought before politely declining. There was no tell whether or not Shadow was hesitating to say yes or to say no.

Tonight was the night. You practically begged him. Your hands clasps his, bringing it to your chest. Puppy eyes refuse to break contact even as he slightly turned his head away. “Pretty please Shadow? Pleaaaase? I really miss you. Just one night,” you implored.

Shadow grits his teeth. The glaring annoyance in his features conceal Shadow’s inner turmoil. Curse these damn thoughts. If only you were begging for something else. I’d give it all in a heartbeat.

Damn it— “Tch! Fine. For one night.”

It’s a good thing he already replaced those torn covers…

*ੈ✩‧₊˚

The plan was simple. You take his bed, Shadow takes the couch. With this arrangement, he can keep himself in check while you’re still able to get a peaceful night’s sleep.

What a fool he was hoping that you’d agree.

Even though Shadow insisted he take the couch so you can have his bed all to yourself, you countered with, “Well, if you’re going to sleep on the couch so will I! I didn’t ask to stay for the night for us to end up not sleeping together, idiot.”

At first, you tried to sleep with your head laid on his chest. Leg propped over Shadow’s torso. Normally, you both wouldn’t have a problem falling into a deep slumber like this. A subtle steady heartbeat coercing your body to drift away. Protective arms wrapped around your being. Tonight? You weren’t sure if who you’re nuzzling against was a hedgehog or a wooden log.

Try as he might, Shadow couldn’t relax his muscles. In and out. Focus on breathing. Nothing else.

Don’t pay any mind on how much his body has been aching for your touch. Ignore the hot breath that tickles his chest. Your sickly sweet scent filling up his nose. The way your crotch is pressed up against his hip.

You resign, noticing the rigid, mechanical breathing. Wordlessly peeling yourself off of Shadow to lay on your side, back towards him. Better not make him any more uncomfortable even though you really wanted to cuddle him. Give him space and let him chase.

Almost immediately, some of the tension Shadow was holding dissipates. Finally allowing himself to sink further into the mattress. The air feels like a thousand needles pricking him now that your warmth is gone. A heavy breath leaves him, not noticing he’s been holding it in this whole time.

It would be so much easier if he simply told you what is going on. Why he has been ‘distant’ for the past few weeks. Bringing up the topic feels too awkward, too… humiliating. Your partner is so stubborn when it came to asking for help. Shadow didn’t need to suffer alone at all if only he spoke up. You were more than happy to assist him whenever needed… this Shadow knew well.

Weight of the mattress shifts behind you. Springs crunching and squeaking underneath. You paid no mind as your consciousness stood at the border of dreamland.

As the last strand of thought was about to be plucked away, a paid of arms found purchase around your waist. Like a squeaky toy being squeezed, your eyes shot open and bulged out as you quietly squealed from the sudden movement.

Shadow’s body and yours press up against each other. Legs tangle with one another. A tender kiss is pressed to the back of your neck sending goosebumps down your spine.

Sleep finally drags you into the void.

ੈ✩‧₊˚

Moonlight peeks through the cracks of the black out curtains. Watching your every move. Shadows intertwine and dance upon the cool sheets of the bed. Ecstasy clings onto every inch of your skin. Combined sweat glistening due to the spotlight provided by the moon.

“Ngh.. haah.. Shadow—“

Your heart leaps out of your chest. The utterance of your partners name startles you awake. Wetness pools in between your legs from the dream. Underwear sticks uncomfortably to your cunt.

Heavy breathing combined with something hard pressed against your ass signals that you’re not the only one having a wonderful dream or maybe he was the cause? Pressure varies from light to firm in a nice rhythmic pattern.

Shadow’s arms are wrapped around you tight, unaware that you’re awake. His hot breaths that moan your name tickle your ear. One hand begins to wander. The inhibitor ring gets caught by the fabric, here and there, contributing to his clunky movements. Eventually it finds its way to the edge of your shirt. Shadow’s bare hand slides up your abdomen, between the valley of your breasts, before settling on a mound. Gently but firmly gripping it. Even though you call out his name, no response is given. Shadow continues to hump your ass, riling you up more. Hips begin to move in tandem with his, craving more friction. A whimper escapes past your lips, calling out his name once more.

What woke Shadow up was your hand squeezing the top of his. Blinking the sleep away, he became more aware of his actions.

Guilt swallows him up whole. Shadow mutters a rushed apology, “I didn’t— Forgive me.” His ears flick back momentarily in agitation as he begins to free his limbs from you. Although untangled your hand refuses to let go. When he sits up, so do you. Oh no, you’ve let this gone on long enough.

“Forgive you for what?”, you interject, worry laced in your words. Due to the low light in the room, you could only partially see Shadow’s expression. An oh so familiar mask of stone adorns his face.

He doesn’t move an inch. A good sign. It means he’s not immediately avoiding or distancing himself from you. A chance to reel Shadow back... To keep him grounded.

Silence follows your question. Again, you speak up, “What’s on your mind, my love? You’ve been acting odd these days. If there’s anything I can help you with…”

The void of the room stares straight back at Shadow. Thoughts collecting to form a coherent sentence. Finally he speaks, though not of his own volition. Words spill out before he could stop them, “That’s the problem. You can and you would. Taking advantage of you is not something I intend to do… but I might with my current state.”

Brows furrow and a deep frown sets on your muzzle. “What the fuck are you talking about.” May the gods praise you for your patience with this man—. Sucking in a sharp inhale you speak again,“Shadow.. It is not taking advantage for accepting my help. Otherwise I wouldn’t have offered in the first place. It’s not as if I’m physically unable to say no later down the line anyways,” your free hand reaches up to Shadow’s cheek, turning his face towards you, “So if you could please tell me instead of having me guess, I would appreciate it.”

Your hand is so incredibly soft. Shadow couldn’t help but lean into your touch. “It’s— rutting season,” he mutters under his breath.

“What?”

Although he’s facing you, his eyes refuse to meet yours. Shadow’s shyness announces its presence in the form of crimson staining his cheeks, “It’s.. supposedly the time of the year for hedgehogs having the urge to breed.” His tail thumps excessively at the thought of knocking you up. Reaching back, Shadow grabs his tail to hold it still.

The cogs in your brain begin to turn, putting the pieces together. This whole time he was acting touch adverse due to being overstimulated by your presence. You’d be lying if you said you weren’t a little disappointed that Shadow didn’t tell you sooner.

Taking too long to answer, Shadow takes your silence as judgement. “Hmph, I’m sleeping on the couch,” he announces, shuffling away from you.

“The hell you are! You’re finishing what you started tonight, mister.” Your partner is forcefully yanked back and pinned onto the mattress. Straddling him, you can see his features much easier. Eyes looking up at you widen in shock before narrowing. Shadow’s fangs flash in a mischievous smirk.

“You are aware of what you’re asking, right?”

“Uh, yes?”

Easy as flipping a pancake, you two switch positions. Your hands are in tight grips above your head. Shadow leans close to your ear, chests nearly touching. In a low sultry voice he says, “You sound unsure. Allow me to clarify: I won’t be done with you until you’re passed out or I’m empty, understood?”

It was as if a switch had been flipped inside him. Now that the laundry has been hung up to air, Shadow can finally indulge what he’s been craving for: you.

Scarlet eyes scan your features for any hint of fear, hesitation. Of course Shadow wants you to be comfortable and enjoy yourself while he lets out his urges.

Immediately your heart leaps into your throat. Excitement shooting through your system like electricity. The edges of your mouth twist upwards into a lopsided smile. “Loud and clear, Shad. You have a lot of lost time to make up,” you answer back cheekily. Finding your answer satisfactory, Shadow encapsulates your lips in a kiss. Starting slow, pacing yourselves, enjoying the moment.

Minuscule moans fill the silence here and there as the pace picks up. Wanting more contact, your hands struggle against Shadow’s grip. One hand lets go to snake under your shirt and massage your breast. The other adjusts to keep both of your wrists down.

So much stimulation but none quite what your body aching for. Legs squirm, complaining about the lack of attention on your bottom half. Your hips arch up, drawing out a guttural moan from Shadow. As you two part, a single string of saliva bridges the gap. He hushes you, “Behave and sit pretty. You can do that, right?”

Entranced, you simply nod your head.

“Good. I promise I’ll take care of you,” Shadow whispers, pecking your cheek. A kiss is pressed to your neck, your throat, collarbone. One after the other, he leaves a trail of kisses leading all the way down to your abdomen.

The smell of your cunt already abuses Shadow’s nose. Hunger grows within him. Patience is a virtue; however, nothing will stop this unholy night. A finger hooks to the hem of your underwear. Delicately Shadow pulls them down, stopping inches from revealing your clit. His lips encapsulates the bud, giving it a gentle suck and a flick of his tongue. A quiet gasp is pulled from you. From there he rips off the thin fabric, tossing it off the bed carelessly.

“Hey! That was my favorite pair!” You complained in a huff.

Teeth graze your inner thighs, causing them to quiver with anticipation. Your concern about the small fabric disintegrated by a simple act. A low feint chuckle can be heard if you listened closely. The underside of your knees are propped up over Shadow’s shoulder after he pulls you down closer by the hip bones. A nip near your pussy elicits a squeal of pain mixed with pleasure. Just as you were about to playfully scold Shadow, a drawn out moan fills the bedroom. His tongue dances over your clit. With each suck, your back arches, chasing his lips. Claws dig into your flesh, drawing little beads of blood. A silent command telling you to hold still.

“Shaaaadow~!” You cry out. So many sensations tingling your skin.

He backs off for a moment, blowing onto the folds of your pussy. Instinctively your knees buckle together.

A quiet, “Hnph,” signals Shadow’s satisfaction in teasing you.

It couldn’t be helped. He’s so aggressive, intending to devour you. Tension builds up in your torso but not quite close to snapping. The folds of your pussy spread as Shadow’s tongue slides up the slit and enters. Drinking up every drop of nectar.

Meanwhile, his bottom half has been busy, rubbing itself against the mattress in a steady rhythm. Every time Shadow got close, he would cease his movements for a second before continuing. All of his cum was going to go inside you.

Time is at a standstill, staring at the bedroom wall. You concentrate on the assault his mouth is currently conducting. Hands cling onto the sheets for dear life as you try to obey Shadow.

“Ah— ah.. please..” you manage out, nearly breathless. He pauses. Darkened eyes look up, waiting for you to continue with your train of thought. The loss of contact allows cold air to hit your cunt.

“Please, what?” Shadow asks politely as if he wasn’t just nose deep in you, “What is it that you need?”

“I need more.. more friction”

Now towering over you, your legs are nearly pressed to your chest. His hands propped on either side of your head, supporting his weight. Shadow’s cock effortlessly sliding between your labia “Mmnh. You’re going to have to elaborate more than that.”

This fucker. Teasing your entrance. One fell swoop and it’ll go right in. Your pussy clenches nothing at the thought, bringing attention of just how empty you are. “Need more.. more friction, please. I need you inside. Please, Shadow.”

“Your wish is my command, darling.”

You should have known better to think he was going to start fucking you. No surprise that Shadow travels back down, sliding a single digit in. You can feel his smug grin against your sex when you hissed out of disappointment. Another finger is added in, curling against your walls. Shadow’s free hand splays atop your belly.

Oh, how your pussy glistened with your arousal. Sweet nectar drip onto the mattress, creating a lovely pool. It might stain after tonight. Your needy cunt clenches around his fingers. That familiar tension rises back up as Shadow sucks and French kisses your clit. So red, puffy, and sore. He’s absolutely proud of his work.

Before you knew it, praises began to tumble out. Your hand reaches down to grab Shadow’s hand, holding it tight. Legs quiver as his hand picks up the pace. A third finger slides in easily. Stars enter the edge of your vision. The familiar bedroom ceiling now turning into a night sky.

“Love, you’re going to crush my hand,” he laughs. His ministrations continue while he rises up to lay next to you. Both of his legs capturing one of your thighs. “Keep them open for me.”

Arms reach underneath, pulling Shadow into a hug. You beg and plead him, “I’m close— I’m so close. Shadow I’m going to cum. Fuck, let me cum please.” When your nails dig into his back, a pleasureful growl bubbles up from his throat. In efforts to silence it, Shadow’s lips crash into yours. The taste of your slick swirling around.

Your hips erratically buck into his fingers, chasing that high. Like a mirror shattering into a million pieces, you had come undone. Screams of ecstasy reaches the heavens even with your teeth buried into Shadow’s neck. Wet slapping follows suit as he guides you through your climax. “Music to my ears. Ah, you’ve done such a good job,” Shadow whispers into your ear, slowing down his movements but not quite stopping. Tears nearly form from the overstimulation. To let him know, you whimper, “Too much”, into his chest, nuzzling in.

When Shadow pulls out, a pathetic mewl escapes past your lips. Already, you miss the warm feeling in your pussy. He brings up his sodden fingers and licks it clean before lifting your chin up to give you another taste. During this little break Shadow’s giving you, a warm palm caresses your cheek, lightly stroking it.

“You better not be tired, yet. I’m not done with you”

Caged below his body, his cock, seeping with precum rests on the low part of your belly. Even though your body is still recovering, it can’t help but shake in anticipation.

A sticky trail leads down to your entrance. The tip just barely prodding the entrance. Your hips instinctively want squirm, allowing it in. Looks like Shadow noticed as well, because he backed away just out of reach. He wants you bad; however, watching your cute little face twist out of frustration was simply too entertaining.

Here you thought that Shadow would be the impatient one, waiting so long to fuck your brains out. How the hell has he been able to keep it together now that finally got what he needed? Well, Shadow’s mind has been teetering on the edge. Holding it together long enough so you’re also enjoying it too. Not only mindless fucking to reach his objective. You’re not merely a means to an end.

“There’s only two things you need to remember, okay? My name, and that you’re mine.” To emphasize the last two words, Shadow slams his cock in one fell swoop.

Once again his claws sink into the sheets and mattress below, unable to contain his fervor. Because your cunt didn’t have enough time to adjust and accommodate Shadow’s length, it squeezes him tight. The sensation was not unwelcome. Pain and pleasure dancing in a delicate tango.

A long breathy moan is accompanied by his own animalistic growl. He does his best in earnest to stay still, savoring the way your pussy stretched and clenched around his cock. “Fuck you’re so good to me,” he moans, “You don’t know how much I wanted you— needed you.”

Shadow’s hips slowly pull back just to thrust deep into you again. The sudden motion causes you to grip tightly onto forearms. Your head tosses back with a gasp.

It felt like you were made for him. Made for each other. He starts to pump into you. Ass bouncing from the force. Shadow’s gaze never leaves your face. Every little expression you make, he commits to memory. The way you have to keep prying your eyes off of his to keep from being hypnotized, entranced. When you bite the inside of your lip or open your mouth for a silent cry of pleasure. Your eyes squeezing shut and brows knitting together, as you violently turn your head from hitting that right spot.

Not enough. Not enough. Not enough!

Your ear is captured between his lips, nibbling and sucking on it. The sensation tickles. You giggle, finally letting out that breath you’ve been unconsciously holding. Shadow whispers into your ear, “Good.. make sure you’re breathing. I’m going to pull you in closer, okay?”

Your hands are removed from him as he sits up for a moment to adjust. In order to gain better access, you are folded up into a proper mating press. Legs hooked onto the crook of Shadow’s arms. Knees on either side of your head.

The new angle allows him to hit you deeper and with the way your hips are positioned will perfectly hold his cum in. Mercilessly, Shadow pounds into your little hole. Despite his best efforts to redirect his fangs, they continue to land on multiple spots along your collarbone and neck. Bruises and bite marks for everyone to see who you belong to.

With each thrust, his dick kisses your cervix.

It’s a good thing you didn’t live in an apartment, but you were sure the neighbors across the street could hear your screams of euphoria.

You looked so lovely. Heavenly, even. Shadow wonders how he was able to snag an angel like you. Those three little words, Shadow doesn’t say them often enough as he thinks he should. You understand. His actions speak volumes much louder.

At the pace Shadow is going at, he’s not going to last very long. Judging by the way your face is scrunched up and the tension in your nether regions, you’re in the same boat.

“Relax. Cum for me, my love.”

That’s all it took for you to unravel once again. Shadow is pulled in for a tight embrace as you call out his name, telling him how much you love him. Your sweet words melt his heart.

Trembling, quaking, your orgasm rips through your body while Shadow continues to snap his hips, his own climax following close behind. If you weren’t so cock drunk, you’d have heard “I love you” tumble from your partner. Words that come out of your mouth are no longer coherent but rather a giant babbling mess. Your cunt milks every single drop his cock has to offer. His movements slow down.

Shadow’s body isn’t satisfied. Even if he wanted to, his hips won’t stop. Not until he drowns your cervix in hot sticky cum. Filled to the brim until it starts leaking out even with his dick plunged deep in.

“You’re mine. All mine.”

Round one of many.